Sunday, December 22, 2013

SET ME F.R.E.E - First!

S.E.T ME FREE! Please. I am tired. When I say tired I mean it. I was told life is a beautiful place and we need to live it to the fullest. Yes! Then why is it that people force you to do things that you don’t want to. Why is it that you have to think about Society before taking any decision that makes you happy? Why can’t you just be the way you are and act the way you want. Why is it that you always have to act as per others and when you don’t you disappoint them? Why is it that when you are quiet people question you, and when you talk too much they think there is something wrong?

I have seen in India or in Indian culture - There is one thing that is not right, and that’s societal pressure. Infact from the time we all are born we are asked to behave in a certain way, act in a certain way, talk in a certain way, and react in a certain way. Why? I mean why do you want the child to learn the following way and follow the same through his or her life? Why can’t you just let him learn his way? Why?

When we are born, we really don’t know anything about this world. We don’t know who we are. We just know how to play, and have fun. We don’t know how this world (Or I should say ‘India’ differs between a girl and a guy).We don’t know how to react but slowly we are being forced to learn these things and follow. We are being said“ Don’t do this, Don’t do that, Don’t talk like this, Don’t talk like that, You need to respect elders, you need to touch elders feet, you need to talk like this to a girl, and like this to a guy, these are the things that you don’t need to say, you don’t need to talk bad”… A guy is being asked to stay away from a girl and a girl is kept away from guy. When a girl is mature enough to understand things and when a guy knows what he is supposed to do they try to come closer and that is as well not accepted by OUR society.  One day, a girl is asked to get married to unknown person and sleep with him. But a girl is not allowed to get married to a person whom she loves. I don’t understand why FEW INDIANS are still living with this mentality.
  
These things develop a mindset and that is “Okay, so I need to act as per what I am being told and if I act the other way I will be wrong”. We don’t try to tell the reason but just ask the kid to behave in a certain way. That way we start ‘ACTING’, and our real self is hidden somewhere deep down inside. We are afraid to bring that REAL SELF in front of people thinking that will not be liked by the societal norms.

So, if a girl laughs too much she is considered exposed and not that respectful. If a girl talks loud she is very LOUD and powerful; the family does not like it. When a guy comes to see a girl the basic thing that is expected out of a girl is: Does she know HOW TO COOK, does she know how to keep the house clean, does she know how to raise kids, and is she soft spoken? Is she fair? Will she able to produce kids? Is she ready to sacrifice her career if asked to? Is she ready to give birth to a kid when the Mother in law is in needs of a kid?

Is that really a good thing? Expecting sooo much out of a person, is that right? We are born as humans and are expected to do certain things in life, but is it necessary to FOLLOW THE SAME PATTERN that “WE are asked to”? Why can’t we live life as per out own conditions and wish? Why is it that if a girl or a guy does not want to get married is still questioned at?  Why is it that society still thinks that if a girl is not getting married than surely the fault is hers? Why is it that if a girl or a guy needs space then surely something is wrong? Why it is that still few Indians are that sick to think that a girl is a lesbian or a guy is a gay is he/she does not have a girlfriend or a boyfriend? Why is it that it is assumed that if a girl gets a little old like 28 then it’s difficult to get a good guy for marriage?

What is wrong with our society? There is surely something very wrong that we need to correct or else we will lose our real self. In fact we have lost the most of it. We are not happy in real sense because the definition of freedom is something that we still need to learn. Why don’t we just stop lying to each other and start living on truth.

We are educated but why is it that we still act like illiterates? People who are so called M.B.A’s or have studied engineering act like they are just illiterates and don’t know anything. They will show that they are modernized and very modern but when it comes to following it they will back out. If someone is open they will back bite and make fun. If someone is laughing his heart out, they will feel ashamed because the person laughs too much or talks very loud.  

When will we actually grow and educate ourselves? When will we stop having double standards and actually modernize ourselves with thoughts and bring it in action?
I surely realize that EDUCATION does not educate a person, but a mind and heart that is open for things is what I will call a real education.

Please set us free! Stop judging, stop commenting, and stop reacting! JUST LIVE!

I am sorry but you need to SET ME (PEOPLE) FREE TO LET ME LIVE TO THE FULLEST!


Saturday, November 30, 2013

DESTINED TO BE . . .

How do you find a perfect person in your life? How do you know if someone is the right choice? Or how do you know if the person you choose will be the one you have always wanted? How do you know if the life you are living is what you deserved or how do you know if the loss you have suffered is what is destined? How do you know if everything that you have got in life is something that you have been destined with?

There is no correct answer for this but just an assumption that whatever is happening is happening because it is destined to be. I know, I know it sounds so much philosophical but that is what people say and that is what everyone on this earth says. Do you really believe on this?

Is it really true that whatever happened or happens in your life is already been decided by someone?

Is it true that everything is pre-planned?

Is it true that every small glass or human is moved by someone’s wish and that someone is unknown?

Is it true that we meet people not by chance but as destined? Or is it true that if someone hurts you or breaks your trust then that is as well destined?

 These questions are highly philosophical and not most of us want to think about them. But it makes me think because things just happen and we don’t even realize how, when and where. Everything is pre-planned as per what I think .From birth to death, from marriage to kids, from whom your parents will be and with whom you will be forever.  If it is not planned then who is the one doing it? How are things happening that are actually happening in our life?

I had this urge to do so many things in life, but it didn't turn up. I turned up to be someone who I never thought will be. When I was graduating the interviewer asked me a question and the question was “Where do you see yourself in next five years”. As usual I said I see myself as a manager in the company I am working with. Also I see myself as a successful professional. At that point I never knew I will be a write, voracious reader and an author or the book “My Vows Remain Unchanged”. I never thought I will work with Deloitte for three long years and still will feel to continue to love U.S. Taxation. I mean things just happen if it had to and if that is not destined in your destiny then no matter how hard you try it won’t happen.

I am sure writing this blog is destined, my thoughts have been destined, talking to people whom I talk is destined, and everything happening in my life is a result of the destiny that I have been assigned to.  I have seen best buddies becoming enemies, I have seen brothers fighting, I have seen lovers departing and I believe it is all the game of destiny.


Well, with this thought I would leave you thinking if you agree to what I have written or not. If you believe in destiny then just believe on it and let things happen. And if you do not believe on destiny then just remember the moment when you tried how to get something in life, still couldn’t get it, that is destiny.  

Monday, November 11, 2013

Hot Shot - Four months is a long time.

My last blog was written on? . . . Can anyone of you guess how many days it had been? Or maybe months? One month? Or two? Or three? Or max four?

Let me tell you. . . It has almost been four months (When I wrote this blog it was four months, and today it had been five complete months).  since I have written anything. Believe me from the time I have started writing, this is the first time EVER when I haven’t written anything for four long months (Like FOUR LONG MONTHS). I am myself shocked on this that I have had so many things to share but I haven’t written anything about any one of them.

It happens right, at times that you know what your passion is but you are not able to follow it for a reason or the other. The same happened with me. I picked up the blogs to write, but left them half written, and saved them as drafts in my documents folder. Writing has always been a kind of art for me. It makes me freebie from my worries and tensions. It makes me feel light after expressing what I feel for something. Writing helps me in knowing my own self. From gone by four months everything has been inside me and has accumulated in my mind and heart.

So, today, I am going to talk about four things that happened in my life in past four months. 

# Work:

Yes, I have been working like hell from past four months. The only thing I did that Deloitte taught me is to work like crazy in busy season and party hard after that. But, working like hell is an issue. And when I say working like hell means working 12-14 hours a day and at time even 16 hours. You have to give up on your leisure time, you have to sacrifice your weekends and you have to not bother about how you look and your eyebrows. But the busy season makes me feel that I am capable of working that much. It is a reality check of your own self, of your patience and learning.

# Disputes:

One bad thing about me is I want to be fair with everyone, and I treat everyone equally. If I see something wrong happening near my space I stand for it and try to correct it. Now when I try to correct it, for sure I make few enemies. Now when I make enemies, should I stop being fair or should I support people in doing wrong? Nope. I don’t think so. So in these four months, I again made few enemies, fought with people, and proved my points each time I thought something was wrong.  Now it had happened may times that I thought something was wrong but I couldn't say anything for that or couldn't take a stand.  The issue is if I am not able to say something for the wrong happenings I can’t be relaxed from within and will keep thinking about the same leading to my own loss of blood.

# Experience:

No matter how much you have experienced in life, it is never going to be enough. Every day or the other will bring something new that you have not experienced before. And every-time you think you will keep the experience in mind so that next time you won’t suffer the same but it doesn't work like that. You will again have the same experience but with different learning this time. Same experience twice or thrice teaches you different lessons. 

In-fact experience is never ending. Even after 5 years you will keep experiencing new things that you haven’t experienced before. At the age of 60 you will experience something that you haven’t experienced till then. But yes, you still need to keep learning from those experiences. God, I am tired of experiencing new things all the times but what to do . . . it keeps going on!

And last but not the least. . .

# It’s just life and it will keep going on.

 Yes, we take things too seriously and we react on things. We can’t take if something unfair is happening with us, and want to set it right. Setting it right makes it gets more worst, and at the end the result is zero. People these days are biased and they are double faced. But, you can’t help it. You will see double faced people everywhere. Yes, we always need to make sure to stand for the right and fight for the wrong but if it doesn't work out, then just let it GO!

Okay, so with this I complete my blog after complete four months and hoping to right every week from now onward.

Achievement to be shared:

Published ONLY 71 articles on this blog and have reached 50,000 views.

Keep reading and share the website to your friends. And do get my book if have not read yet. J

A crazy fan of Big Boss 7!

P.S.: Is it just me who feels that people do wrong things purposely and they pull you down on a purpose or everyone? I assume the later one.


Monday, June 24, 2013

MY ACTION PLAN!

So, I was writing something for the blog and as usual, my mind went all over the places. I started thinking about everything under the sun; about life, friends, mom, dad, sister, brother, my book's new cover, about the next novel, how to concentrate, revenge, hatred, trust and evrythinggggggggg else that usually human being thinks about; like I will drink Orange juice every day- By. Default., I will wash my face 4 times a day- By. Default.  (it's very hot here in Delhi/Gurgaon), that I will pack my things, and what will I work tomorrow in office, the trip to Jaipur that we are planning,  etc etc etc...

It happens with many of us, especially who wants to write. To 'focus' is the major concern of the writers. Since people usually write on laptop that is connected with internet so instead of writing our mind goes to the Facebook updates, YouTube videos, updating tweets, and most of the time go-ogling about something unwanted or not that important at that moment of time. Most of us Want to write but are not able to write. There may be concentration issues or determination. 

I was trying to understand my own situation and trying to figure out that what is it that stops me and many other people along with me to not write. I came with up with few things that stops me to write on a regular basis. 

First was concentration: Whenever I open an article to finish or start, I am surely out of focus and my concentration is more on other things rather than writing. I am more interested in doing Facebook or researching about something. Writing requires a lot of focus and most of the times you lack that to put out your thoughts on paper. 

Second was I couldn't find something interesting to write: Many times I start writing and then the article does not excite me to write it or complete it. I lose interest in the article myself and that makes me to stop there. Next thing I do is to re write the article, well re writing does not work for best - TRASH is what I get and the article is there in drafts folder for months. 

Third is external environment: That affects me a lot, in fact quite a few times. I see people watching movie, going out, just finishing their office work and then enjoying their free time doing nothing. When it comes to me after my office life there is another life waiting - MY Author's life. I sometimes don't want to write at all and enjoy the life like other people are. When after few days I realize that I am wasting my time after work, I get back to writing. 

So I have an action plan for myself going forward. 

The best and easiest thing that will make me to write is 'One word challenge to my own self'. Yes - so what I will do is every week or fortnight I will give myself a word that I have experienced or want to experience and will write on that. Say for example - Crush :), or Love, or Life, or Jealousy, or Career, or Goal. So with that one word I would some up my own experience in life! 

That is so exciting, isn’t it? Let me start with this next month!

Till then you can come up with your own plan of writing. 


Sunday, June 16, 2013

PLEASE CHANGE DO NOT COME AGAIN...

Change is inevitable. Change is always needed. Sometimes change is for good, or sometimes it is for worse. Is change always required? Do we always need to take the opportunity if it is allowing you to change your place or your job or your present stature?

Most of the people here will say, Hmm..it depends. Few will say change is always good as it gives you new opportunities and new ways to achieve your goals. For few it’s a way to follow their dreams. For few it’s just a change that is needed to come out their routine life and form a new routine by inculcating the change. Which one do you belong to?

If you ask me, I fall in the last category. I changed my location just because my life was monotonous. Now monotonous surely does not mean boring. My life was exciting as I was working on my next novel, I was going to office and enjoying working there, I had a routine and I loved it. I just loved my life. But then for me change was just a thought of coming out of my comfort zone.

Was it needed? Necessarily not…

What was the purpose of the change? Nothing specific; just thought of coming out of the comfort zone.

Why did I want to come out of the comfort zone? I don’t know. People said it is always good to explore new places.  

What were the factors I considered before opting for the change? Nothing as such. I just went with the flow and persuasion.

When I answer the above questions myself, I realize that I actually did not want the change. But I was just fascinated by the word change. As we all know change is exciting. You think you will altogether go into the new lifestyle and that is fascinating. Even when your life itself is complete, you look for change that is necessarily not needed at that point of time.

My mom always said, ‘we love when we know people around us. We love when we stay at the same place for years and are still happy’. She always told me change only if it is needed. But I never listened to her or my dad for that matter. I always told them ‘How can you stay at the same place for years and still not getting bored of life’. She always asked me back ‘what is the need when you have everything?’  

Today when I look back at my life I understand what she exactly meant. When you are happy why do you need a change?

Such a beautiful thought!

I realize now that I never needed a change, and I was happy where I was. But still I opted for change and now I want to go back to where I was.

With that I leave you guys with one thing:

Always ask yourself Why, why am I doing this? Before you want a change in your life always ask why do I need this?

What is it bringing in my life?  


If you get a satisfying answer then go ahead for the change. Or else the place where you are presently is a happy place too. Just turn a bit and look at your life again!

Thursday, June 13, 2013

LISTEN TO YOUR HEART!

There are times when you take certain decision not knowing the reason behind it. Even if you know the reason, you are not completely satisfied with the reason, but still console yourself saying ‘This is the right thing to do’. Even when your heart talks something different, you console your mind to consider the decision for your own betterment. Even when people near you, your friends, and your parents asks you to reconsider your decision; you stick on to your decision even when your heart wants to listen to them.

Believe me; I have always made this mistake of not listening to my heart and listen to my mind. Mind always thinks logically and looks at the benefits, and weighs the options. But heart does not do this entire thing. Heart never weighs the options but it simply tells you if something is right or wrong. Whenever there are decisions that I have made on based on the logic or by getting influenced I have suffered a huge loss.

Listening to heart is very difficult, because it gives you the clear cut answer to your problem. If it does not like something then your heart will say don’t do this, or don’t go there. But you try to avoid what your heart says to you and then start listening to your mind, who tells you the options and pros and cons. Once you listen to your mind, you divert your heart thinking mind is saying right.

When you take certain decisions based on your mind and against your heart, you possibly suffer later.
Everytime I commit a mistake of not listening to my heart, I say to myself ‘Enough, now going on I am going to do what my heart says’. But again I commit the same mistake.  I listen to my mind and ignore what my heart says.

But now, I surely have decided I will only do things that my heart allows me to do. I am not going to get influenced by anyone, nor will think the logic behind the decision if my heart is not in allowance with this.
Remember, if you make a decision people will be standing with you, but if it does not work out they will start blaming you for taking the decision. So always listen to your heart and then make a decision. The decision should be purely your own decision. If you think there is others influence or if your heart does not allow then better take a step back and think again. Listen to your heart; even if one beat of it says ‘No’ then it’s a no!

I wish this bad time does not last long in my life. I hate JUNE and this time of my life.


God save me from taking wrong decisions! Not any more please!!!!!!!!

Friday, April 26, 2013

अँधेरी दुनिया और अँधा इन्सान!!


 यह घोर कलयुग है , सुना था मैंने 
चारो और अँधेरा छाएगा, सुना था मैंने 
लोग, लोगो को तकलीफ पहुचाएंगे सुना था मैंने 
अँधेरी दुनिया, और अँधा इन्सान बस यही कहा था मैंने !

वो दिन कहा गुम हो गए जब माँ को प्यार से हम गले लगा लिया करते  थे?
जब पापा को घर आने के पहले कुछ मीठा लाने को कहते थे?
जब भाई से झघढ कर, एक टुकड़ा ज्यादा खा लेने पर खुश हो जाया करते थे?
अँधेरी दुनिया और अँधेरा इंसान बस यही सोचा मैंने!

क्या घोर कलयुग है
आज 'कूल' वोह नहीं जो घर को घर समझे 
पर कूल वह है जो घरवालो को अहमियत देकर अंजानो को अपना बनाये 
जो भारतीय सभ्यता को पिछाडा बताये और सूट ,सारी पहनी महिलाओ को 'नोट सो कूल' समझे 
अँधेरी दुनिया और अँधा इंसान बस यही कहा मैंने। 

क्या तुम अब तक वर्जिन हो? पूछ कर कूल होने का सबुत मांगे 
कितनी लडकियों को घुमाया पूछ कर सफलता का मोहरा लगाये 
लडकियों के कॉल आने पर यह बताये के कितनो के साथ सोये है 
अँधेरी दुनिया और अँधा इंसान, लीला अपरम्पार!  

काश लोग समझ पाते, काश के मैं कह पाती 
के सफलता बॉयफ्रेंड या गर्लफ्रेंड बनाने मे
या किसी से तारीफ पाने मैं नहीं 
बल्कि अपने आप मैं खुश रहना और संतुष्ट रहने मे है!

काश के मैं कह पाती
अंग्रेजी मे बात करने वाले और हिंदी को तुच्छ कहने वाले
पहले अपने गिरेबान मे झाके, अपने विचारो को खोले 
क्या अंग्रेजी आने पर या बॉयफ्रेंड/गर्लफ्रेंड होने पर कोई अच्छा या आधुनिक नहीं होता?
    
सुन्दरता, गोरा या सावला होने मे नहीं, बल्कि मन से साफ़ रहने मे है
पर इस कलयुग मे अँधेरी दुनिया है और अँधेरा इंसान!
ना पापी को सज़ा मिलती है और ना निर्दोष को बेल। 
अँधेरी दुनिया 
और उसमे 
अँधेरे इंसान!
 वाह यह लीला अपरंपार।   

आज की पढ़ी यह समझेगी और समझना चाहेगी 
क्युकि सभी इस दुनिया को जीतना चाहते है जो कभी उनकी है हे नहीं!

अँधा इंसान और अँधेरी दुनिया।

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